(A BuzzFeed writer’s resume)

  1. Five depressing years at a state college (number 5 will crush you!!!)

 

  1. Three different positions in one year (I cried laughing at number 3!)

 

  1. Two unexplained employment gaps that will BLOW YOU AWAY

 

  1. Eight underwhelming previous publications (two are made up)

 

  1. Four impressive-sounding awards with no Google results

 

  1. Five irrelevant skills (is there anyone left in the world who isn’t proficient in “Microsoft”?)

 

  1. Two typogaphical errors

 

  1. One pathetic plea for employment thinly disguised as a letter of intent [gifs] [nsfw]

 

Quiz: will YOU hire this underqualified millennial? FIND OUT NOW!!!

Daniel Galef

@DanielGalef