Is your dealer too friendly? Does he make you feel uncomfortable, forcing you to make excuses so he leaves your place?

Well in the same way that Amazon has made trips to the shops obsolete, the deep web will allow you to order the dark side of shopping directly to your house!

With a little bit of setup, you can browse the eBay of drugs, weapons, counterfeit money and assassins. That last one isn’t even a joke – you can put hits on people, although please don’t.


This isn’t nearly as mysterious as people make it out to be. The deep web is the part of the internet that isn’t picked up by normal search engines. Sites like Google ‘crawl’ through the internet, indexing sites so that you can search for them but Google fails to pick up deep websites. To access deep web links you’ll need a special browser called Tor.


The Tor browser is a modified version of Firefox. It comes in a bundle with a proxy that takes what you do on the internet and sends it through the Tor network where it gets bounced around hundreds of other computers on the network. This makes what you’re doing invisible to your internet service provider. They can see that you’re connecting to the Tor network, but they won’t know what you’re doing on it. Normal links won’t work, these sites can only be accessed
through special links that Tor decrypts for you. This way you never see the actual IP of the site, protecting the site owner.


Just like any e-commerce website, you need money to pay for goods. Unfortunately, paying with your debit card is a bit obvious. Bitcoin was the first decentralised crypto-currency and, although there are hundreds of others, it’s the most commonly used on deep websites.

You’ll need to buy bitcoins and store them in a wallet. A crypto-currency wallet is an app that will ‘store’ your coins. It’s much more complicated than that but you won’t need to know how bitcoin works to use it.


Download Tor from Once you’ve downloaded and installed it, you can access a marketplace by going to its link. Use DuckDuckGo to search (it should be the default search engine in Tor) as it doesn’t track you. I was using the Silk Road 3.1 as a reference for this article but someone hacked it and it got shut down – the links change regularly so there’s no point in writing any of them here. Try Crypto Market or Valhalla (as I’m writing the two biggest, Hansa and Alpha have been shut down).

When you get to a site, you’ll need to make an account. DO NOT use a username or password that is in any way related to you or any accounts you already have, write it down if you need to, but do it on paper. Use a secure password. You’d think people would do this by default in 2017 but I know someone whose password is their last name and year of birth. How his bank account hasn’t been cleaned out yet is beyond me.

Once you’ve registered, login and you’ll be able to search to your heart’s content! On the right-hand side, you’ll find categories such as weed, LSD, bank card numbers, Mushrooms, MXE, Heroin and many more.

It’s Amazon for crack heads.


The problem with buying Bitcoin is that most sites will ask for ID confirmation. The most annoying but most secure and anonymous way of buying bitcoins is to literally buy them off someone with cash. The site ‘Local Bitcoins’ is a kind of crypto-currency Tinder that finds people near you that can swap coin for cash. The next best thing is to buy the Bitcoin legitimately
from a site like Coinbase or Gemini, then send your bitcoin from there to another wallet that you own that doesn’t have your name on it (Google how to set up a wallet, it’s pretty straightforward and there are hundreds of options). You can then send the bitcoin from that wallet to the site. If someone was to look into it, they would see these transactions, but they’d have no way of proving that the wallet was yours.


Buy from vendors that have good ratings and a good reputation. Unlike Amazon you don’t add everything to a basket and just checkout at the end, each item has to be bought separately and it’s also a little bit more complicated (thankfully the site is very self-explanatory). Select how much you want of the item, add your postal address (with a fake name of course) in the format that they give you. Then select your delivery type if needed and place the order.

You might be thinking that putting your address up is dodgy but that codeine addiction needs feeding. Don’t worry though, if it doesn’t have your name on it no one can prove that you ordered it, otherwise it would be way too easy to plant drugs on people. If your package does get intercepted you’ll get a slip from customs asking you to come in and talk about it, just don’t go. After all, you didn’t order it did you?

The website will give you a Bitcoin address to send the money to, along with how much needs to be sent. Send the amount to the address and wait for the money to go through, you’ll need to wait until a few people on the bitcoin network confirm the transaction for it to be verified, be patient! Once the confirmations have been made to verify the payment, don’t forget to leave a review when it comes in the post.

This is possibly the safest way to buy this kind of thing and as long as you do it right it’s pretty much impossible to trace back to you. That being said use a bit of common sense and don’t blame me if you end up in jail.